Date Ideas in NYC That Aren’t Dinner

You’re at a restaurant 25 minutes into a first date, the appetizers haven’t even arrived yet, and you and your date are awkwardly sitting in silence because neither of you can come up with anything else to say. If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. While there’s absolutely nothing wrong with dinner and drinks, it can get old quickly, and it can sometimes be awkward, so it’s always nice to have some other ideas to choose from.

Why Skip the Standard Dinner Date?

date ideas in NYC that aren't dinner

Dinner and drinks is usually the default date, presumably just out of convenience; everyone has to eat, and it takes very little planning to grab food in a city full of cafes and restaurants of all kinds. But that doesn’t mean it’s always the best option.

On a first or second date, sitting face-to-face across a table can feel like an interview, and you’re stuck trying to make conversation for 90 minutes, like in the situation above. It’s great if you like the person and you vibe well immediately, but it can be a nightmare if you find yourself with someone you don’t really click with. Obviously, not everyone has a problem with conversation; many people like going out to dinner and learning about the person they’re with. But for anyone who’s more introverted or gets nervous on dates, having an activity takes a lot of that pressure off.

If You Want Friendly Competition With Some Nostalgia: Play Arcade Games

If You Want Friendly Competition With Some Nostalgia: Play Arcade Games

Having something to do can make a date more interesting and prevent awkward silences. Arcade games give you a way to interact with each other in a very low-pressure way, and there are plenty of options in NYC. 

It’s also a very flexible night. When you go to an arcade bar, you typically won’t have to make reservations. You can go at pretty much any time of the evening, and you can stay for 20 minutes or 2 hours, depending on how the night is going and what else you want to do. If you want to grab food and drinks but don’t want it to be the only thing you’re doing, an arcade bar is definitely a good alternative.

Barcade is a great option with 4 locations across the city, including Williamsburg, Chelsea, St. Mark’s Place in the East Village, and the Financial District. They have a variety of authentic vintage games and serve American craft beer on draft, craft cocktails, and zero-proof options.

Ace Bar in the East Village is another option. It’s more of a dive bar that has a few games, including skee-ball, pinball, pool tables, and Big Buck Hunter. There’s no kitchen, but drinks are available, and you can have takeout delivered to the bar. 

If You Want a Date With Almost No Pressure: Go for a Walk

If You Want a Date With Almost No Pressure: Go for a Walk

A walking date is one of the most low-pressure options you can choose. You’re standing next to each other instead of sitting across from each other, and you’re always passing objects or people that you can comment on. This type of date can really be as long or short as you want it to be; you’re not stuck sitting waiting for a meal to arrive before you can leave. 

NYC gives you a lot of good options for this. The High Line is an obvious one; this is an elevated park built on an old freight rail line that runs about 1.5 miles along Manhattan’s West Side, from the Meatpacking District up through Chelsea to 34th Street. It has gardens, rotating art pieces, and great views of the Hudson River. It’s free, and there are plenty of places nearby where you can stop to grab a coffee or a snack. 

A waterfront walk is another option, and there are plenty of different ones to choose from. The Brooklyn Heights Promenade and DUMBO give you the classic skyline views, and Hudson River Park covers a huge stretch of the Manhattan side if you’d rather stay in that borough. 

When it’s warm outside, there are often pop-up markets that sell everything from food and drinks to vintage clothes, records, and art from local vendors. 

One thing to keep in mind about a walking date is that it’s going to be weather-dependent, so make sure you have a backup option.

If You Want to Learn Something Together: Take a Class

If You Want to Learn Something Together: Take a Class

Learning something new together can be a great bonding experience. Pottery studios, cooking classes, candle-making workshops, and paint-and-sip nights all fall into this category, and most of them are fairly beginner-friendly.

An instructor runs the evening, so there’s structure built in, and you can chat as much or as little as you want while you work. At the end, you both walk away with something you made, which is kind of fun. 

There are plenty of studios around the city that offer these classes. Gotham Pottery has beginner wheel throwing and hand-building classes where most people are first-timers, and Mugi Pottery on the Upper West Side runs couples nights twice a month. Some pottery studios are even BYOB, so you can bring something to drink while you work. If you’re not sure what type of class you want, sites like ClassBento and Classpop list hundreds of options around the city, from cooking to candle-making, and you can search by date and neighborhood.

The one catch is that classes need more planning than most of the other options here. They have set start times, they sell out, and you’ll usually need to book at least a few days ahead.

If You Want Someone Else to Do the Entertaining: See a Comedy Show 

If You Want Someone Else to Do the Entertaining: See a Comedy Show 

Comedy is one of the more underrated date ideas out there. A show takes the pressure off both parties for at least an hour; no one has to carry the conversation, and when it’s over, you will definitely have something to talk about afterward, whether you loved or hated the show. 

It’s a good option for newer couples because you find out pretty quickly whether you find the same things funny, which is an important factor in a relationship for most people. 

NYC has a lot of options when it comes to seeing comedy. The Comedy Cellar in Greenwich Village is the most famous, and big-name comedians have been known to make surprise drop-ins there. Gotham Comedy Club in Chelsea runs nightly lineups as well. If you want something more casual and less expensive, Brooklyn venues like Union Hall and The Bell House host stand-up, and there are other smaller venues around the area you can choose from. 

If You Want Something Playful but Don’t Want a Bar: Pick a Hands-On Activity

If You Want Something Playful but Don't Want a Bar: Pick a Hands-On Activity

If the idea of doing something together sounds fun but a bar setting isn’t what you’re looking for, NYC has plenty of activities where you can be active and get your hands on something. Mini golf, bowling, pool, and ping-pong are all really good options, and a climbing gym works if you’d rather do something more physical; most have beginner walls, so neither of you needs any experience.

These activities work for a lot of the same reasons arcade games do. You always have something to do, conversation happens naturally between turns, and a little friendly competition can be fun. If you’re on an early date with someone, seeing their competitive side can actually be pretty telling. 

Some of these spots can get busy on weekend nights, so it’s worth checking whether you need to reserve a lane or a table before you head out.

If You Want Something Low-Key and Entertaining: Museums, Galleries, and Exhibits

Museums and galleries give you a constant stream of things to talk about, and you’ll learn what catches the other person’s eye, which is a nice way to get to know someone without asking a bunch of personal questions. For some people, disagreeing about artwork is actually fun, and the stakes are pretty low. 

NYC obviously has no shortage of options. You have the big museums like the Met, MoMA, and the Whitney, and some of them have evening hours depending on the night. There are also galleries you can visit for free; the galleries in Chelsea are free to walk into, and there are smaller ones scattered around the Lower East Side too. Immersive exhibits and photography shows pop up around the city all the time as well. 

It might be best not to plan on seeing an entire museum, especially on an early date. A place as big as the Met can easily take up half of a day, and no one wants to feel obligated to spend hours there if they aren’t having a good time. Pick one exhibit, one wing, or one neighborhood gallery cluster, and see how that goes. You can extend the visit if you’re having fun, or continue the date somewhere else.

How to Pick the Right Non-Dinner Date

How to Pick the Right Non-Dinner Date

If you’re stuck deciding what to do, it really just comes down to what kind of night the two of you want to have. You can always go down the list and try multiple different date ideas over the next few months. 

Think About the Vibe You’re Going For

This is one of the big ones. Are you interested in doing something where you have to move around a lot and actually engage in an activity, or would you rather relax a bit? If you just want to be entertained, a comedy show is a good option. 

If you want to do something active, rock climbing or even a waterfront walk could work. If you’re somewhere in the middle, an arcade bar does a little bit of both; you can sit and have drinks, and then you can get up and play games until you’re tired. 

Think About What You Want to Learn About Each Other

You can also consider what you want to get out of the date and what you want to learn about the other person. If deep conversation is the goal, a walk or a museum lets you do that and doesn’t put a time limit on the date. If you want to find out whether you have the same sense of humor, a comedy show will answer that pretty quickly. Games and competition show you how someone acts when they’re a little out of their comfort zone, and a class tells you how patient they are when neither of you knows what you’re doing. None of this needs to be that deep, but different dates show you different sides of a person.

Consider How Much Flexibility You Want

Some options will lock you into a day and time. Classes and workshops have set start times and need to be booked ahead of time, and to see a comedy show, you need to buy tickets. An arcade bar or a walk lets you leave after 30 minutes or stay all night. If it’s an early date and you’re not sure how it’ll go, the flexible options are often the better pick.

Don’t Pick Something One Person Will Hate

This sounds obvious, but it probably happens far too often. It’s best to pick something that each person will enjoy, and if not enjoy, at least not dislike. You probably don’t know the other person that well, so just throw out some options and ask which they prefer.   

Factor in the Location

Think about where you’re both coming from and how you’ll both get to the location, especially if it’s a work night. No one wants to travel an hour through NYC for a date, so make sure you discuss convenient locations before making a choice. Picking a spot with other options within walking distance or close to public transportation also makes it easy to cut things short or keep the night going, depending on how the date goes. 

A Good Date Doesn’t Need a Dinner Reservation

A Good Date Doesn't Need a Dinner Reservation

There’s no single best alternative to the dinner date; it really depends on the couple. Some want a little competition, some want something quiet, and some just want an excuse to walk around and talk for a couple of hours. When you have something to do besides sit across the table from each other and eat, conversation tends to flow a little more easily, and it takes some pressure off a night where you’re both still getting to know each other. Whatever you end up choosing, just make sure it sounds fun to both of you.

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